gylfie
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  • two days in a row of **** productivity. can we go for three!?!???

    watch me get fired bc my brain can't focus on stuff it doesn't care about. like i literally couldn't work unless i had a show/musical in the background and even then it was slow and just felt like ****. wish they hadn't told me it was busywork while we're waiting for new stuff to come in. at least with this its not like it's on a tight deadline but god I've just felt mentally awful this whole time. really really love that my productivity n mental health are a fun roller coaster either power focusing through for a week straight or trudging along for two and only wanting to sleep. maybe I'm just over-tired. i should go to bed.
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    gylfie
    gylfie
    ur so sweet gargee tysm T___T <3
    the rest of the week went a lil better so hopefully that upward trend continues..! though i do have to use zbrush this weekend so uh. we'll see if that derails me as badly as i think it will >____>


    road rage? idk her. zbrush rage? as soon as i try to do anything in this convoluted program i want to break something and also cry. i curse whoever programmed it to be this way. i curse them whenever i open it.
    gylfie
    gylfie
    well heck i did struggle but i think. i got it done???
    Gigarchomp99
    Gigarchomp99
    i havent used zbrush but from what my brother and dad tell me it's a real pain. :( glad you pushed your sisyphus boulder and overcame it tho!! proud of you!! ^.^
    my mom decided she wanted to pickle cucumbers today so now the whole house smells like pickles .________.
    gylfie
    gylfie
    truthfully i love the smell of dill. it's just that the vinegar was way overpowering ;;;
    Typhlosion
    Typhlosion
    That's fair. Props to your mom for making her own pickles, which isn't something I think many people would bother with anymore.
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    gylfie
    gylfie
    what else is there to do these days really ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
    hhfdhghuugh i think i ****ed up my arm,,,, just,,, gotta finish this commission and then another one and then sketch smth for her and then 3d model smth for her and not die at work. this is fine. how did this happen
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    gylfie
    gylfie
    tfw someone pays $100 for a digital painting and then prints it out on regular paper at home instead of getting it printed nicely at a shop:tearazurill:
    Gokudera
    Gokudera
    Glad your arm is feeling a bit better, Megan! :mrgreenazurill:
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    gylfie
    gylfie
    update: they're getting it printed on canvas and the paper print was just to show the person they were giving it to before they figured out proper printing options. WHEW
    man literally whenever a vocaloid song comes on and I'm like "damn this slaps!!" i check who it's by and every time without fail it's a song by police piccadilly
    anyone else feel like they're constantly fighting their brain to stay focused?
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    Cynical Toast
    Cynical Toast
    all the time
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    gylfie
    gylfie
    update: this occurs when I'm given too much time for a task! i focused a lot better today now that we've been given half the time to do about the same amount of work
    gylfie
    gylfie
    hmmm it's happening again and yet i have more work than last time.......
    I just found out there are a bunch of webtoons w printed versions and even entire box sets I’m????? English release pls...... TT _ TT
    gylfie
    gylfie
    k finally got to read the hug chapter and waaahhh its so good T_T bam was hurting and khun could tell. the tenderness......wailingcat.jpg
    as a bonus, the comment section actually had a few people talking abt how good it was to see them hugging and there were only a few homophobic comments ("two guys hugging like that is creepy"? maybe u would benefit from a hug then my dude. enough with the toxic masculinity. let guys hug each other. let them be soft. let boys be vulnerable with each other and maybe we'd have less men with mental health issues bc they never ****ing talk abt their issues to work through them!!! toxic masculinity hurts men just like it hurts women!)

    also like. ppl are gay, steven.

    i was indifferent abt canhong dying but seeing that she's alive was a nice surprise! her and lulu are cute..... and good for lefav being like "yeah I'm not here bc i like jahad i just wanted money so I'll help u if u don't kill me :)"

    also seing love and augustus!!!!!! and i'm actually hype to see the yama/yarascha rematch. too bad it's going on hiatus in 2 episodes tho ;;;;
    gylfie
    gylfie
    got the gang together to watch the last episode n im glad we can all agree that u literally can’t read tog and come to the conclusion that khun is heterosexual. its just not possible. also just remembered that khun canonically has a criminal record of at least like 30 instances of fraud. be gay. do crime.
    ik im probably setting myself up for disappointment by hoping for khunbam so I gotta remind myself that shibisu/khun is also super valid. just two smart dudes that trust each other and one of whom has the other as “My love” as his contact name. Still not sure where it came from or if it’s a translation thing but who am I to complain.
    hfjdb every time i think abt the idea of endorbam becoming canon i'm just disappointed. like i saw someone post that bam and endorsi have similar colours for clothing at one point which is fair but like... i feel like siu knows how to write believable romance (roen/daniel, goseng/horyang, cha/dowon, anaak's parents). hint: they're believable bc we clearly see that it's mutual for every single one of these pairings. so surely if it's supposed to be canon, something will change so i can actually get into it. but as of right now, i just can't do it.
    siu drinks his respecting women juice bc of the number of diverse and interesting female characters he includes, so i rly hope he doesn't do endorsi dirty by putting her n bam together as they are now 😔

    Thought it was interesting that they made ghost a sort of extra life for Rachel. Interesting as in weird bc he comes back like 400 chapters in and has nothing to do with her LOL
    but man I could write an essay on why Rachel is valid and her reactions and feelings are reasonable.
    Man now I’m thinking abt an au where yuri arrives too late and bam dies. She finds Rachel instead. What would she do? Would she help her? Headon knows Rachel is weak and bam had the potential to be incredibly strong so why did they get the same test? He tells Rachel to end bams story in order to climb the tower. Why did he want her to do that? Did he really want him dead or did he want him to get picked up by fug? So many questions.
    Reasons Rachel is valid:
    -had the common sense to tell Headon the test was unfair. Bc it was an unfair test. He tells her she should’ve tried. But for what? She would’ve died and they both know it. Bam lived bc Yuri saved him. That I think is what pisses me off. Rachel was right to say the test was unfair. But she gets called a coward for not being a reckless and naive fool with nothing else to live for. Bam would rather die than never see Rachel again, but Rachel wanted to live to see the stars. I don’t like the notion that you should be willing to throw your life away even if you know the odds are impossible. She wanted a fair chance.
    -I’ll have to go rewatch it to double check but she tried so hard to keep bam away from her. She left him behind. She concealed her identity. She tried to send him to the next floor without her by helping him win the crown game. She let her teammates kill anyone in order to ensure that they won.
    She intentionally got herself stabbed so she could tell bam to leave her behind. She wanted to get away from him so she could shine on her own. How can a star shine when it’s next to the sun?
    -ppl are like “girl you had a boy head over heels for you and you threw him away!” But you’re not obligated to like someone because they like you. She basically raised him bc she was told to by Arlene iirc? But that wasn’t what she wanted to be. Was it cruel for her to try to leave bam behind knowing he’d be stuck in the cave for however long? Sure. But she was stuck there too and wanted out. Their relationship wasn’t a healthy one obviously bc she was literally the only person bam knew. I think the anime makes it more obvious that bam had an unhealthy image of her and some of the things she taught him were questionable. Why is she bad for trying to get away from their unhealthy relationship and live her own life?
    gylfie
    gylfie
    WAIT HOLY **** LESSA IS STILL ONGOING

    ENGLISH SEASON WHENNNNNNN T______T

    AND DR FROST TOO IM
    me: takes two hours to get in a headspace that will let me work and then sister walks in and immediately breaks the focus bubble
    her: oh couldn't you just try harder to focus in the first place?
    me: WOW!!!!! why didn't i think of that before!!!!!!!!
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    gylfie
    gylfie
    might've...found a workflow for this project??? maybe???
    gylfie
    gylfie
    me: hmm i wanna write stories sometimes
    also me: can't sit down for more than five minutes to try to muddle through a cover letter
    gylfie
    gylfie
    love that i hit a groove on a saturday night and can't do **** during the week lol

    but hey i think i know how to uv unwrap now?
    started watching haikyuu. have some chatter
    gylfie
    gylfie
    oh hes not gonna be like that forever? honestly i wasn't sure i could stand it lol so good to know
    every time he said anything i was like

    hjgfh he's just exactly the kinda person id hate to have on my sports team


    hinata seems like. naively optimistic. i can only assume he's in for lots of disappointment.
    Moxie
    Moxie
    Yeaaaaah. I mean you're probably going to be able to read the pattern of the story for the most part if you've watched any sports anime, but Hinata's optimism is crazy infectious

    Even three seasons later he still is bubbly somehow

    And yes kageyama will lighten up! The show really starts on the slow side but it'll build
    gylfie
    gylfie
    ok im kinda into it now lmao

    tbh the upper years are still > the youngsters. shaved head guy is my fav bc he is chaotic stupid and man bun is relatable, team dad is Good and grey hair just seems like a nice chill dude. thought i was gonna like shorty guy bc i can relate and for the most part i do but like. why'd he have to be horny tho 😔 society has no need for that character trait.
    hhhhh i dont..know how to use zbrush and my project is due friday....
    gylfie
    gylfie
    i think they’ll be ok but im gonna be worried regardless ):
    gylfie
    gylfie
    figured out a zbrush workflow: google a tutorial before you try doing anything at all. for everything. no matter how simple it may seem. just look up a goddamn tutorial.
    gylfie
    gylfie
    yeah i forgot to do that again but i did it eventually so now i think i have a better idea of what I'm doing
    hey HEY I HAD A THOUGHT
    anyone interested in doing a drawpile sometime? just get a buncha people to draw together online n maybe discord call/chat while we’re at it?
    Fafrir
    Fafrir
    I would be interested in doing this!
    >knows that using reference will make my art better
    >uses reference for once and it looks better than if I hadn’t used it
    >surprisedpikachu.jpg
    just saw the first visual teaser for the tower of god anime and im shaking it looks good!!!! ive been following this webcomic for at least 6 years and its finally happening!! its coming out sometime this year aaaaaa
    gylfie
    gylfie
    tog fanboys when they haven't *****ed about that one spoiler in 5 minutes

    god shut the **** up and get a new joke. is it that hard to let the new anime watchers enjoy the series without being spoiled

    thoughts on the first ep:
    -i enjoyed it overall! i think the art direction is phenomenal; i really love the look of everything. BGs, character designs, it's all *chefs kiss*. the 3d was pretty subtle so i think they did a good job with it.
    -things felt a little crammed in but it looks like they're gonna try to get the entire first season into 13 episodes. that's 78 chapters so it's kind of to be expected
    -the op tune doesn't really feel like an op but I'm getting used to it. the op animation is good but also super edgy??? i don't know why its like that and honestly i laughed bc we just watch bam stumble around in a dust storm and get his ass kicked by..no one?? i mean they really went ham on the composting so it looks rly nice but??? i can't connect with it. it doesn't make sense to me.
    -the ed is nice but again not what id expect of an ed. sad that we didn't get an ed animation.
    -i think the animation is really nice for the most part. the jump kick thing was definitely a creative decision, but given that some people thought it was a mistake, it didn't look intentional enough.
    -the bg music is v nice though sometimes it doesn't feel like it matches the scene. i would've expected more mystical sounding music for the cave scenes or on headon's floor but the electronic sounding stuff will match better in the different areas of the tower.
    gylfie
    gylfie
    thots on episode 2

    -the music is rly good yeah
    -the way they're portraying rachel and bam makes it easy to see that it's unhealthy and imbalanced, but also feels different from the webtoon. i think it was originally unbalanced because she was the only person he knew, but the way they did it in the anime makes it seem like she's intentionally setting him up to worship her and asking him to fight for her. it doesn't feel true to the series because it was originally much subtler. it was a hypothetical situation to help bam understand what conflict was, not outright ask him to fight for her. he says "i belong to her" in the anime but "i do it for her" in the webtoon. they're not the same.
    -rak moments were funny but i wish they played it just a smidge more seriously; he's really powerful and a scary alligator! i wish they hadn't used the cape gag twice but it's genuinely hilarious that its canon that khun keeps a **** ton of snacks in his bag
    -wish they fleshed out anaak and hatz's battle but i get they have a lot of ground to cover. shibisu is so dumb and funny i love him
    -i was caught off guard by zero ro's voice but honestly it works bc in the webtoon he tries to talk cool but everyone is like "ew wtf"
    -the shinsu sequence was nicely done but i kinda wish lero was more in a sicko mode to show just how terrifying rankers are
    -HANSUNG. god I'm so excited for his test
    gylfie
    gylfie
    thots on ep five

    -fight scenes for the most part were *chefs kiss*
    - love how they elaborated on khun's fighting style of using the briefcase to duplicate his knives, and weren't shy of how vicious he can be in a fight
    -oooof i genuinely hated masked lady's body shading. thats not how clothing works. i can only imagine how uncomfortable it would be to wear something that fit like that lmao
    -PONYTAIL KHUN
    -anime khun is a cat basically
    -rak calls endorsi fluttering turtle omg..
    -the light show bam put on to protect rachel was unexpected. interested to see if that'll change anyones attitude about him and put a target on his back bc he already had the black march and also can do THAT
    -speaking of black march, she can stop time???? i mean it might've been just to show what she was doing. interesting that she seems to have a "sleep" pattern about her.
    -bam attacking mask lady while she's down shows just how deeply rachel's lessons are ingrained in him. i think his webtoon counterpart would have done the same if he hadn't blacked out after the shinsu attack
    -khun puts the crown on bam's head like a coronation. interesting. definitely not alluding to anything
    -overall rly exciting episode
    picked up hxh so im gonna yell abt it here hehe
    gylfie
    gylfie
    I'm playing the 1999 version in the bg while i work and goddamn it's like kurapika and leorio are literally a Married CoupleTM, illumi and hisoka are murder bfs. they're literally on beach vacations together lmfao

    haha what if we travelled together a little longer? just kidding...unless...?
    gylfie
    gylfie
    jesus poor canary is so pale in the 1999 ver. at least they fixed her in the new one
    gylfie
    gylfie
    HJDKYHJSFJV IM MAD
    season 4 got added to netflix and i didn’t know until id watched all but the last 6 eps smh
    wowow lmao caught myself spiraling bc i was too chicken to take the last piece of cake in class today
    Mystical
    Um do you want to talk about it? Hope things get better.. :(
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    hfjdg WHEW sometimes i forget people see these uhhh YeAH honestly I'm actually doing pretty alright n things are better than they were at the low points last semester and the year before.
    i think being aware of those thoughts and acknowledging that they're not rational is progress and i'm gonna say i was def overtired today ahah. these notes are more of a record for me so i can look back and see how i've been feeling

    i rly appreciate u taking the time to check in tho!!
    gylfie
    gylfie
    update: i think my mental state is extremely dependent on my creative projects (they're regrettably directly related to my self worth) and i hadn't picked a project for my next module that i actually wanted to do. i've found something i rly wanna work on so i feel pretty much back to normal now! this happened last semester so i gotta watch out and try to plan so this doesn't happen again;;;
    finally trying some of the photoshop brushes i've been hoarding for years and im having a grand ol time. they look rly nice like real watercolours aaaa
    how to deal with the feeling of impending doom whenever I think about my projects and not being good enough or having a passion or thinking about the future
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    gylfie
    gylfie
    Meltdown count: 3.5 n counting
    gylfie
    gylfie
    Crisis temporarily averted. For now.
    went to tims to try to get a breakfast biscuit w egg n bacon and they had neither biscuits nor eggs but i guess that’s on me for going there at 11pm
    Grunt Beavie
    Grunt Beavie
    Tim's tries to be a resturant but they aren't designed to be one. Take it from someone who once worked there.
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    gylfie
    gylfie
    oof well hey at least you're free now!
    they're trying to cover too many bases,,, blease,,,,i just want a good donut
    School’s in session so you know what that means! :-)
    gylfie
    gylfie
    Time for stomach aches and probably throwing up whenever I don’t get enough sleep! :-))))))
    gylfie
    gylfie
    really torn between going absolutely feral and having a whole meltdown on the floor rn
    gylfie
    gylfie
    Ended up having a meltdown whilst trying to go to sleep so that went abt as well as you’d imagine
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